Yuuuup, sounds just like me. Yes, it's a thing, but it's not a good "normal" thing and we should be doing our best not to let ourselves fall into such mindsets. Sooo much easier said than done, I know.

What helps me sometimes is to remember how the other person is probably perceiving what I'm doing. It brings me back to reality for a bit at least. For example, if I do what you said and shut off communication to test if they care, they don't actually know they're being tested... So if they don't seek me out or take a long time to do so, it doesn't necessarily mean that they don't care. That said, if you're always the one to initiate conversation with someone, that's not really a good sign either - in that case I would either bring it up directly that you wish they would initiate or just let that person go.

I do my best in the last few years to just be straight with people. It not only helps me to get issues sorted, but helps them to know how to deal with me. I'm still trying to find the perfect balances of how much to say and when to say things, I definitely have not perfected my system yet.