I have considered it, but because I know a lot already - like how she's scum and so was my birth father - I have been able to stave off what little curiosity I have in finding them. (For those curious I have more details in the thread I made in the BPD forum regarding adoption, I don't care to write it out again.) The only thing at this point that would make me feel better about her is if I found out she had improved her life and become a better person. I would feel much worse if I found she was still the same person, worse, or even dead, so at this point I'm not ready to know more because there's too much risk if I find unsavory information.