Had a session today. T told me that my reaction to the questionable massage was not over the top and said he thought most if not all other people would likely react strongly to that too. He even said that if a friend or family told him about the same situation happening to them, he’d push them to take action against the massage therapist. In a way, it felt validating to hear him say that. On the other hand, it hurt because he didn’t say anything about me taking legal action, suggesting he doesn’t really care about me much. I just hope he cares about me as a client a little bit. I left the session feeling really and worthless. I’m really questioning whether I had a right to feel so violated, and if the masseuse truly did anything wrong. I sat in the parking lot for 40 min after our appointment looking at massage regulations in the state this took place in. I couldn’t find too much info so I actually called a lawyer specializing in that stuff and left a voicemail. I don’t plan to proceed with any legal actions, seeing as how I don’t have any proof and it all happened in a state I don’t live in. Plus I don’t feel it’s that serious. But I will admit it felt empowering to leave that voicemail. I froze up during the massage and didn’t tell him to stop like I should have, which I’ve been really mad at myself for because . It makes me feel like I don’t have the right to be upset. I guess calling the lawyer sort of made me feel like at least for once, I won’t let what someone does to me be completely swept under the rug. Even though I’m not really going to file anything. I still feel conflicted and like I’m being too dramatic, but I think maybe I took a step in the right direction towards healing?