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Originally Posted by MatBell
I have these constant thoughts that I'm a complete failure. That I've never made a single right decision in my life. That I'm just wasting away and I'm never getting better. I'm 31 but feel like I have the security of an 18-year old.
No matter where I turn I'm reminded of my own inadequacies, why everyone is better off than me. I'm so sick of myself, I want to crawl out of my own skin. Do you know the feeling?
I was put on 300 mg I]Venlafaxin about 4-5 weeks ago. On one hand I can feel them kicking in these last few days - a certain lightness, less anxiety - but on the other hand I'm still feeling awful. They can't fix the state of my life or the loneliness that's always been there.
I just don't know what to do. I feel I'm in a cul-de-sac. I'm so suicidal.
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Yes, at my much older age I feel as if I failed in living the life that I was ‘destined’ to lead. I don’t really believe in destiny, though. Maybe I should say that I failed to meet the expectations of family and close friends. I was supposed to follow a legacy trail but I veered from that certain path and became an acknowledged failure.
I’m much older than you. You don’t want to feel this way when you’re twice your age. Probably the only advice that I have is that you have the time to work out what is most important to you and to set realistic goals.
It isn’t fun to feel a failure, is it? Yes, I know the feeling.
I’m on a very, very low dose of Venlafaxine — my primary problems are with mania and psychosis — but when I was in MDD it helped me a great deal.
All the best...