I realized recently that I have high functioning autism, possibly Asperger's. I grew up in a family where everyone but our mother had autism. Today I don't see anything positive about it. My entire life was a struggle. I have three siblings and none will talk to me about it. I am so tired of them and so tired of the bad memories. I just have to say that it was a struggle that seems unending and I'd like it to end.

I don't really want to go on with this. I want to stop living. I am very alone and I have nobody to talk to about it. I am also very old. I can't see the point of going on. I want to be done with it. Is there anyone else out there who has similar feelings?