Hello Seagull: I noticed this is your first post here on PC. Welcome to PsychCentral! I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

I don't know as there is a lot I can offer you here in the way of advice. I'm an old man now... but one who has waged a life-long struggle with gender identity dysphoria. (It's a long story. I'll spare you the details.) And, based on my own personal experience, what I would say is that issues related to sexual orientation (as well as gender identity) can be extremely confusing. Concerns such as you have can be like jumping down the proverbial rabbit hole. And the more you ruminate over these sorts of things, the more difficult it can get... sort-of a vicious circle, so to speak.

So personally I think the answer here may be to find a therapist you feel good about, with whom you can delve into what all of this means to you. Continuing to allow all of this to rattle around in your thoughts is, to my mind, a prescription for ongoing confusion & unhappiness. You may have to try a few therapists before you find one you have confidence in. (Not every therapist works well with every client.) But if you can find the right one for you I think this might be the surest way to put all of this to rest.

One other option that may be of some help would be to start a journaling practice. Here are links to 3 articles, from PsychCentral's archives, on the subject of journaling for better mental health:

The Power of Journaling | The Recovery Expert

The Health Benefits of Journaling

Journaling to Help Reduce Stress and Anxiety | Happily Imperfect

I wish you well...