Nathan, I am sorry you have regrets about spending more time with them, but maybe that was not easy for you especially with social anxiety. Just the fact they looked up to you must be a reassurance that you are basically a good person.

I think with any loss there are regrets. we are not prepared for the finality of death. It is not something we think about often. For me losing my dad there were regrets that if only we were closer, but that would have made letting go more difficult. I do not see any easy way out of grief. The closer the person is to us, the more difficult the situation is to get through.