I’m a newbie here and need some help! I had a rough upbringing! My mother was very controlling and my dad was often harsh to me! First my mom.

1) My mom was often intentionally late in picking me up from school at about 45 minutes growing up! She would not let me take the bus home all the time from school some of the time either! I could have been kidnapped! She made me late going to school by yelling at herself in the bathroom!

2) She had double standard rules by which means she expected both my dad and me to do things for her right away but when we wasn’t Ed something from her it was on her time. She never let us clean but yelled at me when I never organized well nor did the dishes right. At one point she broke the glasses!

3) She tried to suffocate me with a pillow a few times

4) when I went to college she expected me to call once a week. She called several times and demanded to return her call when I did not meet her requests!

5) When I moved back she expected me to live with her for the rest of her life!

I cried and was frustrating living around her. I know she was raped and abused by her father but that had no means to take it out on me.

My dad yelled at me and smacked me up the neck when I could not get homework and stuff.
I cried a lot! I was frustrated! Gratefully my mother is dead and no longer giving pain to others!

Currently I’m in my second career as a nurse assistant going for nursing and have a BA from university of California Santa Cruz in music! Any advice here on how I can get rid of this pain?