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Hello Silversparrow:
It's always a bit difficult to know what to say to someone in your position because the thing is, you're where you are and I'm where I am. I can't see you or the space you're in, all that I (or anyone else) has to go on in your words.

Maybe I'll share a story with you...
<blockquote>A few nights ago I had a dream that some demons were calling me. It was as if they were in my cellar and were being very insistent. I felt drawn, down the steps, toward their voices. Then, I could see them: nasty little demon faces and nasty demon hands pressed up against a plate of glass -- the only thing that separated us. For a moment, I felt sucked into what they were saying and began to feel panicked and overwhelmed. Then some other voice in me, some other much stronger voice said: No, I am NOT going to feed you! And I realized that's what I had been doing -- feeding them with my fear.

I stuck my arm into the earth of the cellar and found a handle. I pulled on it hard, and the demons came out, all wrapped up in a chest made of glass. I then dragged the glass chest over to a table in my basement. I heaved the chest up on the top and then pulled a cord to turn on the light that hovered over the table. I made a nasty little face myself then, as if to say to the demons, "There! Take that!!"

I was a bit scared by what I'd done so I left them alone for a while, but I kept watching them from the other side of the room. I noticed that they were shrinking and getting smaller in the light. After awhile, all the demons were shrunk down to nothing but a single seed. But the weird thing was, as they had been shrinking in size, plants began to grow in the room they were in. Green plants! Healthy plants! Beautiful plants! I liked the plants but I wasn't sure what to do with the little demon seed. I decided to leave it sitting in that glass chest, on the table, with the light shining into it. And I also decided that I better be careful to not feed it.</blockquote>

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I'm not sure why that dream/story came to me just now but I think maybe it fits into this space just fine.