Dear T,

The gaping, sucking, hole in my chest pain that makes it hard just to breathe is back. I feel clingy and needy and anxious.

When I found out I'm getting out of work early on Friday due to software upgrades I really wanted you to say you had a free appointment then. I don't want to wait until Monday. I didn't want to hear that you're not in the office at all on Friday afternoon.

I should be calling you. Except I can't. I can't be that burden. Better to pull inside myself.

On Monday I want to ask for a hug, except since you're gone the following week I don't want to "waste" a session on that. You'll want to talk about it first, I'm sure. I don't want to admit that a hug would mean you care about me and that I want that. I want to be cared about.

I'm sorry, T, that I am so weak.

-GeekyOne