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Now I know most patients think but it's only for me
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Sky, while I respect your opinion I have to disagree. I don't think MOST patients think but it's only me. I think when patients call their Ts they may be thinking about harming themselves, killing themselves, obsessing over things that have been said, or many other reasons.
Above, I advocated for T being paid for the calls and extra time and I mean that. I'm not anti-T. I fully believe that they should be paid for their work AND that they should be there for the patient. Therapy is flat out painful and at times close to unbearable. You can't resolve emotional strife by rationalizations, it just doesn't work. Textbook solutions to our issues aren't always the answer.
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I'm sorry that you feel punished. Try and think of it this way: T is helping you discipline yourself for your own best interest.
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If one feels punished, as I have, I don't think the answer is that you are undisciplined and need someone to discipline you for your best interest. Actually, the feeling likely comes from the past and is one that has been reinforced over the years. I know intellectually that my feelings don't match what is going on, but they still are my feelings. And they still are intense.
There has to be a way that our in between session anxiety can be reduced/alleviated AND the therapist can be paid for his work. I gave an example of how in my response above. Yes, the object is not to be reliant on your therapist. However, if the therapist is skilled, he should know how to gradually reduce this behavior in a way that builds the self-esteem of the patient.
We need to start a peaceful revolution that will better therapy for both the therapist and the patient. All of the issues on both sides need to be addressed and dealt with. I really think this is possible. So, where do we start? DocJohn, any suggestions? Anybody?