Hello cupcakes: I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral! I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

I believe your post was moved here to the relationships & communication forum from the new members introductions forum. The relationships & communication forum will be a good place for you to continue to post on this subject should you wish to do so. Another forum that may be of interest would be the women-focused support forum:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/women-focused-support/

I'm sorry you find yourself to be in this most difficult situation. Unfortunately I don't know as there is a lot I can offer with regard to it either. At some point, what all of this may come down to is simply you making a decision with regard to whether or not the relationship is worth trying to salvage. In the end, you only have control over yourself. From what you wrote, it sounds as though your fiance has some serious mental health issues. But if he does not recognize them, & won't do anything to address them, there's no way you can force him to change. One thing I would say, with regard to all of this, is I don't personally feel you should harbor any guilt with regard to what happened with your fiance's dad. From what you wrote, it sounds to me as though you made the right call.

Here are links to a selection of articles, from PsychCentral's archives, that may be of some interest:

Should I End My Relationship? Important Considerations | Healing Together for Couples

You Deplete Me: 10 Steps to End a Toxic Relationship

Are You Staying Too Long in a Relationship?

You Can Only Change Yourself

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/imper...ant-to-change/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/can-people-really-change/

I wish you well...