This just sucks. I am still not feeling much better. Managed to eat a protein bar, that was it.

I called and moved my appointment up earlier. It was scheduled for Sept. 5, but now I have one on Monday morning. I don't think he's in on Fridays. He does hospital rounds, I think.

I think an in-person appointment might be better for me all around, so the pdoc can also see how I'm doing, which is not great. My BMI is freaking 17, and I couldn't eat lunch today because of anxiety and I'm overexercising because of the anxiety. I called and made an appt. with my PCP just to get things checked from the weight loss, also on Monday, about 1.5 hr. after my pdoc appt.

If I get really bad before then, I'll call.

Ugh, now I feel like calling and canceling both appointments, but I’ll keep them in the interest of my family. If I didn’t have my husband and daughter, I wouldn’t bother with this fight any more. Don’t worry. I’m safe and not going to do anything to myself other than likely over exercise and/or have another whiny few days. I don’t self-harm, used to some in college and lucky to have extremely minimal scarring, but not since before I met my husband. I just wouldn’t want to have to explain anything to him or my daughter.