Well, I wasn’t able to complete my physical. Nothing to do with my mental status. The PA just wasn’t comfortable letting me do the running and lifting without my spine dr’s clearance because of my herniated discs. I’m very disappointed but it’s probably for the best. I’m just worried that if he says I can’t do it that I’ll lose the job. The PA assured me that wasn’t the case but I’m not sure. I won’t be happy until I’m actually in training. Then I’ll know I’ve got the job for sure. Stupid back problems. I’m getting injections tomorrow so at least I’m already seeing my spine dr. I don’t have to wait to give him the paperwork so I’ll be able to reschedule my function test at work sooner rather than later. And if he does say I shouldn’t lift at least I won’t hurt myself lifting. That would be bad.

Sigh. I wish things could be easy lol.

I’m still mulling over what my boyfriend said last night. He said my son disrespects me and he gets upset but obviously doesn’t say anything because he’s not his parent. But he says if it continues my son will have trouble with authority later in life. He’s not the first person who has told me that I’m too easy on my son. My mom says it all the time and my two SILs have said it too. It’s th same problem I had in teaching. I just don’t have any authority with kids and it’s something about me or my personality but I’m not sure what. I guess I just give up too easily. I get overwhelmed easily and just say **** it. I know that’s not a good way to parent. I was stricter with my son tonight and he seems to be responding well. He’s still In his room whereas by now he’s usually come out three or four times. I just have to follow through on my punishments. That’s where I usually fall down.