I'm almost regretting deciding to go to see the bfs family. He got a van from work but the ac doesn't work. Its all his family, so he's happy. It took 9 hours to drive here. Im hiding out in the van for a bit. So hot. I'm not a social person so im withstanding four more days of this. Bed doesn't fold out properly. I doubt anyone cares if i just stay here the rest of the night. All they do is drink and smoke weed. I'm missing my son already. He's doing better, has a job. Haven't posted in a long time and i know I'm complaining but i can't complain here. Bf seemed certain to dump me just 2 weeks ago. I don't think i should have asked for another chance. People don't really change. Myself neither and he was sooo unhappy, i should have let him go. Its bound to end at some point and im just prolonging the pain.

Why cant i be normal and happier and more social . I think this is going to be the end of us when we get back home. I really shouldn't have come. Laughter and people are going to get to me soon