Wow interesting because this is exactly what I have been diagnosed with.

I really owe a lot of my stability to finally finding a medication combination that works for me... and probably just pure luck. I mean. I still get dips and I still have troubling symptoms (my mood is controlled a lot better than my psychotic symptoms are)

But its all... so much better than it has been. And has been for a while. But now Im in this limbo of not being actively sick but not being able to truly relax because getting sick again is still possible and probable. So its odd. Its like- just a reminder that no matter how well I get Ill never be truly well.

Plus I feel bad complaining given that so many people are still struggling with some of the things that are just... have been so awful to me. It feels odd complaining about things since they have gotten better because it almost feels I dont have the right to.

Even though... maybe that doesnt make sense? I dont know