I feel you happycheeks... you are not alone. My Mom was a very cold, negative, and stubborn person, (especially to me). She ALWAYS favored, supported, and lauded my other brothers though, so it confused me. It made me feel like it was me. After all, she even told my Dad to ensure I didn't come to her funeral. Even knowing this about her and coming to terms with how she was, it still did hurt. BUT, the thing I finally realized is that it had NOTHING to do with me. I wasn't a bad person or horrible son, I just tolerated her behaviors and her ability to release the frustrations and stress of life onto me. I didn't stand up to her because I was always seeking to eventually find love and validation from her. I didn't want to 'rock the boat' lose that 'chance'.

Think of it this way, when a bully (My Mom) puts me down and abused me, they will continue to do so as an outlet for THEIR shortcomings and frustrations. It's not about you, but rather your tolerance of the situation. I'm not saying you need to take a stand or revolt against her because I cant determine the full dynamic of your relationship. However, I can assure you that it's not about you...

*hugs*