I don't want to be a burden on anyone. I don't want to drag anybody down by telling them how bad it is. If people care about me, and they find out that I have depression, they'll try to help. They'll try to give me advice and to console me at the cost of their own joy. I don't want that. I don't want people to sacrifice their own sanity for my sake. It isn't that I'm a lost cause, either. I know that I can get better. I just don't think that they should waste their time and energy on me. There are more people who have it worse then me. They deserve the kindness of others, not me.
I don't know. I guess I'm just stupid or something. Why do I think like this? Of course, I need to let others help me, but I can't bring myself to accept it. I hate it when my logical side and my emotional side conflict. I know what needs to be done, but I don't feel good about it.