Finally got my psych results test back and they showed unspecified bipolar disorder as well as dependant personality disorder (not bpd). Oh and gen anxiety disorder. Going to try going back to therapy with specific goals...i need to start writing these out. Well, I'll probably be around here more often to check in, now that I have some more specifics.
Current state, scared, but validated. Scared of my relationships and my lack of ability to do things at certain times, but at least someone recognises my issues and wants to help...and I have this place.