This is kind of a silly issue but i am worrying a lot.

I have almost all of the symptoms of adhd (inattention type). I have them from childhood. I have been struggling a lot for a very long time. My career is primarily study based, since i am pursuing phd in physics. Whenever there is any assignment or exam, i cant at all organize and totally
mess up big time and underperform. Time management is zero. And whenever i need to read important papers i cant concentrate and cant remember. This is a maddening struggle and is killing me ever since i left the structured environment of school. At one point, I had tried very hard to change on my own but failed. For the last 10 months i am gradually also becoming very depressed, and one of the reasons i feel is my adhd symptoms and the associated helplessness and hopelessness.

When depression was gradually setting in, i went to doctor. My country is not developed, so you cant find adhd specialist, only general psychiatrist. I am sure he doesn't have much experience with adhd (most ppl here go for depression and ocd etc). Though i mentioned my symptoms, he just concluded anxiety and prescribed me antidepressants. It didn't even improve my depression. I went back after 2 months, he changed the medication and even that didn't work at all. So i thought maybe i should focus on therapy. I went for therapy regularly for 6 months (no diagnosis yet) , but no change in neither depression nor the adhd symptoms.

At this point i am heavily depressed. I feel the depression is half due to adhd but then, o cant be sure.

Finally i sat back and thought, in my country, where most psychiatrist and psychologists are not at all experienced in adhd, it will be hard for any of them to recognise my adhd(if at all i have) if i simply say 'concentration prob' etc. So this time i took a bolder step and consulted a psychologist who diagnoses problems and thought of directly saying her 'i want to have a screening test for adhd and depression'.

Next friday is the appointment.

Now i am very nervous. Sometime i am thinking that i am enforcing the stuffs. A part of my mind is telling me i am just making up. But you know, its true that nowadays i am so depressed that i can hardly getting out of bed. And on the other hand its also true that i always have had a hard time to get organised and concentrate on my priorities. Nowadays, my concentration problem, forgetfulness and organisational issue has become so worse that I cant concentrate on studies which is essential for my career and am lagging behind and just dragging along.

Is it okay to have adhd and simply remain undiagnosed and untreated and drag along like i am doing, constantly performing lower than my worth? Is it proper to simply take antidepressants to lift my mood and do nothing about adhd?

Do you think, under all these circumstances, my recent approach of directly asking for adhd and depression screening, is proper? Or am i self-assuming too much? Any alternative way of approaching both these issues?

Kindly tell me what you feel..