Thanks for the ideas and throwing some things out there. No, we really do not have anything of much value to sell for collateral. Even my engagement ring was something like $300. We have 2 computers, but between my husband, my daughter, and me we need them both. Same with our cars; they are old too—a 1995 Jeep Cherokee and a 2007 Subaru Forester. I guess some toys of my daughter’s, a couple family jewelry heirlooms passed down from my husband’s grandparents, but we really don’t want to sell the heirlooms, and they are not worth that much anyway (except sentimental value). I do have books I could sell on eBay, but the state I am in now, it would be too much to deal with. And that wouldn’t bring in much as most are paperbacks. I can’t handle day to day very well right now.

A lady did call me this afternoon after I finally emailed the school counselor for some ideas, and she can help me with maybe finding a pdoc for emergencies (though I don’t need that) or a less expensive one come January; mine will suffice for now. I have his cell phone number and an appointment on Monday. I couldn’t talk to her long because I needed to leave to pick my daughter up from school. She sounded as if maybe she could get someone or be an advocate for us, but I am not holding out hope unless it happens. She is supposed to call back tomorrow. We’ll see.

My eyes are tired from crying so much told, and the low dose Seroquel stopped the worst of the panic attack but made me sleepy. I hope my husband had a decent day today. Things feel 100% harder when he is down and depressed. No idea how I am going to cook tonight. I feel like I’ve been run over by a giant truck.

Sigh. Even simple tasks are hard these days. I tried to put contact lens cleaner on my toothbrush when I was getting ready in the morning, and things just got worse from there.

Maybe this lady can help. I hope so, but I’m not holding my breath until it happens.