Well, thank you for responding. I can honestly say that a) having written something (and then sent it), and b) getting some sleep afterwards has done me some good and I feel a little better. I think it was a long few days at work and just feeling very worn out that “pushed” me to the point where I just needed a bit of a rant. Maybe writing something will have the done the same for you. Feeling a little less negative about everything now, I want to help and offer advice, but I’m aware I’m not an expert in any way, shape or form, and that I may be either giving advice you’ve heard before or spouting clichés, but I can write stuff anyway and, if you want to ignore it all, you can.

Being envious of couples/people in relationships is unlikely to do any good. I’ve done my share of being bitter about other couples (sometimes purely because they’re a couple) and it just seemed to leave me feeling worse off. What annoys me about some people in relationships is when they’re sickeningly in your face about it. Note: Not all couples, just those who feel the need to be by each other’s side all the time. I mean, I’m happy for you and it’s good that you’re happy to together, but you don’t need to mention them all the time, you ARE capable of going places without them and you don’t have to be all over each other in public (you’re not teenagers)! That aside, I guess we all just have to tolerate it. If we want what they have, one day we might be like those people. Maybe we like to think we won’t be as bad as the people we see, but we just don’t know.

We have to make sure we don’t fall into the trap of thinking that we are in some way “owed” something, because we consider ourselves to be good people. Being solely interested in sex doesn’t necessarily make someone a bad person (just like not being all about sex doesn’t make someone a good person). It just depends how honest people are about it. If people are up-front that they just want a sexual relationship, I don’t see any problem there – if it’s what both people want. Obviously if people lie about being interested in others when they only want sex, that’s different, not appropriate behaviour and I certainly wouldn’t approve of it. Everyone needs honesty. We’re all after different things and we have to try and find someone who best matches what we need. I’m not remotely interested in a purely sexual relationship, so I don’t go looking for such things. You shouldn’t be forced to be the only person doing something in a relationship either. If the other person isn’t doing anything, or doesn’t want to do anything, to help the relationship, then you shouldn’t be with them. Relationships rely on compromise, so it’s give and take with both parties. If they aren’t respecting you cut them loose.

I suppose this is what was frustrating me when I first wrote my post. Sometimes you can follow all of the advice people give you, do everything right and still not get anywhere. When that happens, you have to just shrug it off, no matter how many times it happens. That’s just the way life is and life isn’t always fair. If we’re convinced we’re not doing anything wrong we just have to stick with our choices and things should work out in the end. Otherwise we can examine ourselves and our actions, and look to see whether we need to change anything in order to better improve ourselves and our situations.