Quote:
Originally Posted by DapperChapper
You make some interesting points. However, let’s be clear, if my choice is to either remain single, or get into a relationship where I know I’ll be unhappy, I’ll obviously stay single (that’s a no brainer). I’m not going to get with someone unsuitable for me *just* for the sake of being with someone else. There has to be a future in it. That’s another reason why I’ve been single for so long – because I would rather be a bit lonely than subject myself to an unhappy situation. But is hoping to meet someone and be happy so unreasonable?
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Just to clarify.....we don't consciously know the relationship is going to be bad when getting into ut. I thought through & rationalized that it couldn't possible end up like my parents because of the differences. I thought even with the issues I was having that they would iron out in the marriage. Also because of the normals we sometimes grow up with those red flags we see looking back on them were just normal functional problems that people explain away be "that's JUST how guys (or gals) are"
I stated in my original response that hoping to meet someone & be happy is NOT unreasonable. I even stated that if the right person even at my age showed up I could be convinced to go for it again no matter how bad my first marriage was. If the connection (which I have now learned to recognize) is there, the happiness of being with the right person is worth it.....otherwise I will stay single & continue to take care of myself.