Quote:
Originally Posted by Echos Myron redux
LT, a lot of your most upsetting experiences have centred around peoples responses to you (take MC for example) so I don't think you are under any illusions about the way people respond to you. That's why this T reiterating a similar response to those you've experienced in the past seems less than helpful. It seems like further rejection and shaming. Much better, I would have thought, to explore where these needs are coming from and deal with that, rather than to supposedly try to educate you on his own ideas of what other people might be thinking. The irony that he accuses you of mindreading...
I don't know whether he has completely missed what an intuitive and attuned person you are, LT, but thinking he can somehow change the way you relate to others by telling you what others have told you before is patronising and really underestimates your ability to work this stuff out for yourself, I think. There are underlying needs driving your behaviour, not a misunderstanding about what other people think.
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May respond more later, but wanted to say we actually addressed his claiming to know what others (ex-MC, H) are thinking today. And T said he's just giving his thoughts, that he admits he "doesn't know jack s*** about what they're actually thinking." That if he, for example, suggests what my H could be thinking, that I could say, "You know, that doesn't sound like something he'd think."
I think we came to a better understanding about a lot of similar issues today (like my feeling he's judging me, etc.). I know none of that will change your opinion of him, but it's like he and I seem to get each other more now and identified some areas we need to work on--both with me and with the therapeutic relationship--going forward (areas that I fully agree with).