I think the dr. would say that I’m hypomanic. If I do truly exhibit the symptoms identified with bipolar, then I would say that I spend a bunch of my existence in a mixed state, because I’m often agitated, touchy, and on the edge.

I would also say - again, if I am really bipolar - that I have rapid cycling. I’m known for being way up or way down, with little in the middle.

Something tells me I’m not really answering the question. Truthfully, I don’t know what the reality of my situation is. I usually have too much noise in my head to pay attention. I really don’t know what is real. I’ll think that I do, but when I try to explain what I’m thinking and feeling to my wife she often tells me that my perception isn’t aligned with reality. Other times she tells me I’m a genius. Go figure. But this has always happened; not just with my lovely soul-mate.

I said that to say this: it’s now 4:06 am!

No, not that. I said that to say this: I don’t know what my mood is like, but I remember my wife telling me that I’m acting differently. But I don’t see it.