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Old Aug 26, 2018, 02:51 PM
sctak sctak is offline
Junior Member
 
Member Since: Aug 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by tomatenoir View Post
I don't have any advice, I just want to say I empathise.

Last week, in session, I cried like I never have before. I then completely lost it when my therapist offered no physical comfort. (And then didn't help himself by asking me to describe the 'complete and total despair'.) I wouldn't say the rejection damaged trust (because I do think not touching clients is a valid decision for a therapist to make). But it's damaged my belief that my therapist can help me continue my with me on my healing journey. And it's made it harder to open up. It's also been a bit of a mindf***, because so many therapists subscribe to the view that any touch will ultimately hurt a client, or hinder their ability to process things. And after a year of trying to come around to this view, I've realised that I can't. I need touch to heal.

After the last session, I sent my therapist a text about how I can't continue without touch, and we're discussing it Wednesday. But I if I'm honest, I think there's a 98.5% chance this conversation will be the death knell of our relationship. It hurts, both because I like my therapist, and because I know how far I could go with him if he would just touch my hand.

But there seems to be a lot of people on this forum who are the same way, so it's good to know I'm not alone.
Sorry to hear that. This isn't much condolence but I think therapists sometimes (like the rest of us normal humans) lose a little compassion if they feel like their "values" are being questioned. As in if part of his ethical values is no touch, then he might have a hard time having a solid rational and compassionate conversation with you about it. That doesn't make it any easier for you unfortunately