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Originally Posted by marvin_pa
I think that 'now' is something that is fundamentally important to the way the human psyche has developed & to it's balance & well-being. Because we are cognoscent of the past & aware of the possibilities (and dangers) of the future, we are at risk of ignoring the present moment & instead, fixating on the decisions of the past & the choices faced in the future. What gives use the ability to perceive & project, is also what can prevent us from being effective & engaged in the present.
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I think the past, present, and future are equally important. I tend to see things a bit differently though -- I'm a historian at my core, my OCPD + anxiety are obsessed with the future, and my psych therapy is all about the here and now.
The past is important because we wouldn't be the people we are now without our past experiences. Also, consider that every other country in the world finds history an important school subject to study, whereas the USA deems it almost unnecessary. (This is why I hate American history, because we NEVER learn our lesson and just make the same stupid mistakes that others have made in the past.) Other countries are right, though: If you learn from the past, you can avoid making the same mistakes and learn better approaches/ways to deal with events.
The future is important because we need to plan for it and set certain things in motion in order to have a good future. A simplistic example would be going to school. You know you need at least some sort of academic instruction (minimally learning to read and write) in order to succeed later in life. Much of what we do is in consideration of the future. Even buying groceries or working a job are done in advance of having food to eat and having money to pay bills.
What therapy is trying to teach me -- and I'm not so good with learning -- that you have to live in the present otherwise you'll never be happy. If you don't live in the here and now, you'll never reach a single goal because it'll just be a stepping stone for the next goal. You'll never win, you'll never succeed at anything, and you'll never be happy. Honestly, I've been living for the future for so long that I've truly forgotten what it feels like to be happy so now I'm having to re-learn that. For example: I didn't even realize watching my adorable cat sleep contently with her tongue sticking out (which she does when she's happy because she lost some of her teeth from malnutrition before I got her) made me feel happy until my therapist pointed it out.
So all 3 are really important.
Quote:
Originally Posted by marvin_pa
Here, I'd beg to differ. Depending on belief, it could be argued that right & wrong are fundamental absolutes enshrined at the beginning of creation - however, the human perception of right/wrong will inevitably have a personal interpretation based upon personal/environmental construction. Therefore, the positioning of those goal posts are always subject to individual variation - due to this, right/wrong at a societal level must become something of a compromise, rather than being fixed points. It's a price of having the ability to make individual choices - something that's likely essential to our development as a species.
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I think both you,
Michael2Wolves and
marvin_pa, are a bit off on their perspective on this one and the reason is straight out of a therapy session: The world isn't black/white, right/wrong, good/bad; the world is full of shades of gray. People are not entirely good or bad, people don't always make the right choices or the wrong choices. I'm saying this but I'm still trying to learn it myself -- and maybe by saying it here I'll help reinforce the idea in my head -- but it is true. I think I'm a good person but some of my decisions/actions in my life haven't been the best (most notably trusting a family member who embezzled from me and keeping them in my life after finding out about it). So am I a bad person for this? I don't think so.
Quote:
Originally Posted by marvin_pa
But fear is also proof that you're alive...
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Fear may be proof that you're alive but it is no less exhausting.