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MissCharlotte said:
Did you love the hug too?

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">Ummm, yeahhh!!!

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I remember finding it really hard to let T see me in my angry mode. But I am finding that the biggest payout comes when I can get angry at him and let him see it.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">It is really interesting that getting angry can have such big pay-offs in therapy (for me, the T doesn't have to be the target). My anger lead to T's recognizing my fear and then my childhood flashback and my dissonance in session and then the child ego state whose feelings are directly linked to my own current adult feelings. Anger is a good key to unlock doors. With my hang-ups about anger, it actually helps me a little to realize that anger has this really useful therapeutic function. Maybe next time I am having trouble expressing anger, I can just think inside, "go ahead, be angry, this could be a key!"