I think your gut is spot on, this isn't right at all. Your partner is not being much of a partner to you, he is being irresponsible, and getting defensive and angry at you. This definitely sounds like he's trying to manipulate the situation, and manipulate you. And it's already working, because you are walking on eggshells trying not to upset him and 'ruin' his night, when it's really his own irresponsible and reactive behavior that is ruining things for you!


It sounds like he is projecting his insecurity and anger and defensiveness onto you, too. And I agree with Sisabel, this is a pattern that isn't likely to change. I'm sure he has his good qualities, and that you had good times together. But this sounds like a classic case of the 'honeymoon phase' of abuse ending.


I'd advise you to get out of that relationship. Ultimately, what you do is up to you. But this lying, anger, and projection are abnormal and hurtful, and you have the right to be treated better than this.