So, my boyfriend has been talking about engagement for a while now. He frequently says things like "I cannot wait to put a ring on your finger", "I can't wait to marry you", and "I need to put a ring on your finger ASAP.. and like RIGHT NOW" (mainly in response to other men looking at me).

He's also talked about asking me as soon as money comes in that he's been waiting months to receive. That money is coming to him next week.

Then the other day, he mentions that he'll ask me over New Years, or after New Years, at a concert, if we go....

And I got really bummed out. I mean, here he's been talking about getting engaged as soon as this money comes in (which is now), so I am anticipating that and am excited for it. But then to say maybe not until New Years or later is a huge disappointment for me, especially when he's built up so much anticipation.

Not only that, but what I want? I want a romantic setting... I want to be able to call friends and family after he's asked me, to share the news! I don't want to get engaged at a concert necessarily. At a concert, you cannot easily share the news with everyone. That's why I wouldn't want it to be done there.

So, my question is: does the woman have any say in the how or where part of an engagement, or is it entirely up to the man?

I gave my boyfriend the strong hint that I wanted to be engaged sooner than New Years, simply because that is what he has made me expect or anticipate and look forward to.....

But now I wonder, is it really completely out of my hands, or do I have any say in this? I mean, I have imagined this moment too, and have had dreams of how I want it to be -- it goes both ways. I don't know. I feel selfish for even asking the question, but I am really looking forward to this moment with him, and I thought it was going to happen as soon as this money came in.

I know it's not a matter of him doubting a future with me, so that's not the case, in case anyone brings that up, so please don't. Thank you!