Do you see a psychiatrist or therapist? I’ve felt, and still feel, much like you. Not everything but I’m the champion of self-loathing, of despair and shame.

We all wish to be loved; I’m old and legless, having to be buckled into my wheelchair lest I continue to fall on my face and destroy my right eye as I did my left. I would love to love someone and be loved in return. I’m not as lonely now that I’ve overcome my agoraphobia, but I think that being alone on holidays — primarily Thanksgiving and Christmas — brings on the sorrowful loneliness that can only be experienced but not explained.

You’re amongst friends here — and amongst those that can genuinely empathize. This is a good and safe place.

Be safe; be strong.