My situation wasn't like most divorced parents. My mum and biological father were both that stubborn that they were on paper still married until about five years ago.
They split and my father never expressed any regret that he hadn't provided for me, not even physically like food, shelter, clothes. My mum and David pointed this out to me all the time. I knew this and I knew how hard he worked and was the bread winner. But I wasn't his and never would be and that's why Paul was favoured over me in my eyes. I wanted to know where I came from. I had no choice! I had no option because my father was only half a mile away. I walked passed where he stayed on my way to school, it was unavoidable. And I felt a jolt of sympathy for him. I introduced my boyfriend to him. He must have felt guilty and came into my work asking to see me when I stopped visiting.You can't see Someone for ten years and automatically stop thinking about them altogether. Even if they were nowhere near a superhero.

I said I would miss my grand parents more than my parents as a young teen because I was angry at them. I never said it at college because my mum poisoned them against me and then I got un well. I couldn't say my grandad bought me a tv for my room at Xmas because my parents were more interested in their own social lives and drinking. I couldn't bring up holidays with them without the catastrophic one with my parents rearing its ugly head. And going to the beach every Sunday seemed liked a whole other life time. It wasn't exactly cool to talk about my blue nosed but dearly loved grand parents.