Quote:
Originally Posted by Desiree2006
I invested almost a year in this relationship and it's been a waste. I had so many dreams.....well now I have to learn to live alone again. It may be hard being a caregiver but to say that depression is not an excuse for staying in bed is too harsh. I think I did right in breaking up. He was so willing to break up too. It would have never worked out. I guess I'll be more depressed for a while. Right now I feel I can't take it any more....I am like the living dead. And I want to die. But hopefully I can overcome this. I'll miss having a bf but I guess it is at least better than being in a bad relationship. Anyway, we have decided to remain friends.....
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Now he is asking me if I am going to leave him. But he is still refusing to accept me as I am, to accept my MI. He says he doesn't want instability in his life, but he doesn't want to let me go either. How is that possible? I can't change into a different person for him.
I told him that I am not going to leave him(he feels insecure I think tho idk why), but that I am not going to move-in with him. I am going to live separately and he is ok with the idea.
I simply didn't have the heart to say yes I am leaving you...he seemed to need me in some way....maybe bc of his paranoid schizophrenia he is not willing to accept someone who is unstable and mentally ill(mainly depressed), he fears subconsciously that he cannot handle the stress, but bc he has no one except his mom he feels insecure if I say that I will leave him.
