Thanks everybody for your feedback.
I get a strong theme from reading these comments of
A) a sense of control
B) a fear of failure
C) a need for perfection
I suppose they’re all related really. A person is afraid of failure, not just afraid of it but sure of it. Because they predict this failure and it terrifies them, they intentionally “sabotage” the project so it is no longer a failure, it’s a choice. A choosing to give up. And sensing that anything short of perfection, or exactly what you had planned, is a potential failure.
It seems like a very relentless and cruel cycle.
Some of you have hinted at the possible causes of this, a self hatred or self punishment. I will have to try to investigate as to what that could be. The best way to prevent a cycle is to nip it at is source.
If anyone has any self analysis to give as to WHY they believe they act like this towards themselves then please feel free to comment, I’d find it very interesting.
Thanks again for all your help,
FF