Thank you .

We talked again last night. I told him pretty much everything, including that I've been thinking about going forward alone.

But I was also reminded of how special this relationship is. We really do embrace every idiosyncrasy and weird habit we have. I know I have my fair share of complaints with my SO, but they all seem so small now..

I don't know if my sudden infatuation is a result of almost losing him, or if I really do appreciate him as I did before. He coming to visit next week, and I think hanging out with him will help make this decision for me.

Basically, right now I'm actually terrified of losing him and not sure how real my wanting independence was. Of course ultimately it will be up to me to figure out what I want...