Quote:
Originally Posted by Só leigheas
I completely understand that. When I was diagnosed (4 years ago today), the doctor had Kleenex ready. Boy did she looked taken back when I smiled. But then I had to face everyone I love and to tell them the news. I couldn't let them see me go without a fight. It would've hurt them too much. So, I fought it. And so far I've been winning. When I was told I was in remission, I got real quiet and thought to myself "But I was ready". That doctor was thrown off too.
Me telling you this is just another way for me to explain that I understand, at least a little. Oh, and my cancer was stage three melanoma.
I'm not encouraging you to refuse to fight it and I'm not hoping you have it. In fact, it's quite the opposite. But it's also your life to do with as you will.
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I have lived as a corpse ever since I was born... I go through horrible experiences every day. Worst of all my psychiatrist has told me I cannot be a doctor. My parents have made me intellectually disabled even though medicine was my calling from my birth. They think in extremities. I could go on, but it has no point. My psychiatrist just sits and watches as my cognition is destroyed day by day. He could have called the cops, could have counseled my parents, could have prevented all this. He chose not to.
I am feeling like I am the crazy one. I am not going to have neither social life nor academic life. Everyone laughs at me. Tells me I am useless. I have no friends. The only support is my college professors. But even they're acquaintances and cannot do anything other than give me confidence.
There's no point in living like this. I don't want to end up living 'till my 30's just to get rejected at every phase in life with a B.Sc degree. I want to live a normal teenage life, get into med school, become a doctor, research on diseases and help people. A life any doctor would have. I am not asking for Gregory House's skills, I want to make a positive difference in this world and most importantly not be viewed as a joke, and suffer throughout the whole day in every possible way.