You know, I was exactly there few years back. Also this aspect that I was very independent and had always been very independent in my life is similar.

But fast forward few years and all my obsession is gone. I'm not even sure at which moment it vanished and why. I guess it just ran its course. Or maybe that also helped that I sort of accepted that things are now this way and thinking about my T is now a large part of my life.

Therapy still is a large and very important part of my life but with time, it is more and more constrained and contained in the space and time of the session. While I year ago I wasn't obsessing about my therapist anymore, I was still often feelings quite badly after session (like I would just disintegrate or fall into pieces or that I stopped existing, not having any clear sense of self) but now these tendencies have been decreasing as well.

Now I can leave with my session with some sense of self and I can continue with my life, although I know handle it better and with less anxiety than ever before.

To answer your question, of course I talked about it with my T. That's one thing that makes it bearable. If you can talk about it with your T and he accepts you with all your feelings then you are not alone anymore and it will be easier to accept and tolerate these feelings yourself. What you have written about your T in these forums suggest to me that he would probably take your feelings as something very natural and and you could get a lot of relief from talking about them with your T.