I have had trouble with anxiety/depression OCD and panic for most of my life (im 25 now) I went a few years where I felt like I was recovered but lately maybe the past year or so it has been coming back full swing. I want to list a few things to get out of my head that are bothering me

1.) I feel like i'm losing my mind and myself and that im turning into a monster

2.) Intrusive thoughts that scare me about doing harm to others and wondering if I am capable of doing so followed by the feeling I state above

3.) Worry about the future and if I will still feel this way for a long time and even forever which is followed by fears that I will become suicidal

4.) Feeling like I am an outsider because of the thoughts that I have and that if anyone was able to read my mind and my thoughts that I would beostracized.

5.) some of the things that I have seen on the internet by accident that are gruesome and graphic I feel may be messing with my head sometimes and make have irrational fears that something bad could easily happen to me or loved ones at any moment. and somewhat often I find my mind wandering unwantingly to random scenarios of violence similar to what I have seen.

6.) A general fear of the future and if im going to be consistently OK mentally.

I feel like theres more that I think about when im having an anxiety or panic attack but those are just the things that I can think of now that make me feel like im losing it. I hate the feeling that theres something wrong with me its harrowing. I mostly just need to find a sense of not being alone with these feelings and thoughts. The problem is I do not respond well to "Everything's gonna be alright" which I feel like most of you reading probably feel the same way. We need a clear and very logical explanation to why this is happening to us to give something in reality to grasp onto. So I am searching for that logical and clear feeling of not being alone and being normal.