I recall replying to one of your previous posts. Really, at least from my perspective, your husband is the only person who can make the changes that need to be made. (Perhaps other members, here on PC, will have some suggestions.) From what you wrote, it sounds as though you've done pretty-much everything you can think of. Your husband self-medicates, he knows he's ill, he refuses to seek any kind of treatment, plus he's made clear you better not do it for him.

Granted it's just my personal opinion; but my opinion is it's time for you to do what you need to do to take care of yourself & your child. (Some individual mental health therapy services for yourself may be worthwhile.) I realize how difficult this may be for you. But having your daughter grow up with your husband living the way he's living is going to have a lasting impact on her as well. That's another factor that must be taken into account.

Chances are when I replied to your previous post I gave you links to a number of articles, from PsychCentral's archives, on the subject of trying to help someone who doesn't want help. Here are links to 2 articles on the effects, on children, of living with a depressed parent:

I wish you & your family well...