Quote:
Originally Posted by Blueberrybook
I wish I knew what to say to you. I'm newish to the board and don't know your situation. Have you been on meds long? Is this a first try or has it been a long time? Are you in therapy? When is your next pdoc appointment? If it's not next week, call the front desk and tell them you need an urgent appointment. Tell your pdoc exactly how you feel. Meds are not an exact science; what works for one doesn't work for all.
Great job on the sobriety too! 
I don't have any close friends too. My one good friend is now in Connecticut, and my only other 2 close friends are my sisters, which at least I have a good relationship with them. One lives in a decent driving distance; the other does not. But if it weren't for my sisters, I'd have no friends. And my sisters are not people I had to go out on a limb to meet. So I understand that feeling.
My husband tries to help, but he thinks meds are a crutch. They help, but I don't expect them to perform miracles and magically make me feel better either. He doesn't understand that. He struggles to understand MI at all. He still out and out refuses to believe I have an eating disorder. It is anorexia purging type (via exercise, not throwing up), which is super easy to hide. It looks like I am going out just to exercise, I maybe I overexercise and lose too much weight. That is how he sees it. He doesn't see all the thoughts of scales, numbers, weight, foods, guilt in my head. I tend to eat normally (but by then I have exercised off more calories than I can eat in a day by eating normally). He'd flip at the number on the scale, but I don't tell him. Now and again he'll say I'm a little bony and could stand to gain some weight, but he just does not see the ED. |
Hi BB. Thanks for being a friend by responding. I needed a little caring from someone who is concerned about others instead of always self. I see so much of that on here. I'm sorry you don't have any friends either. I too have two sisters. One has spina bifeda and can't walk and I take care of her alot. The other is an active alcoholic in FL...so not close. My husband is supportive of MI because he has BP and Anxiety and Schizoaffective Disorder. I feel bad for you that your husband doesn't get it. Maybe a friends and family of MI group from NAMI in your area might help? Or he could try therapy with you?
My husband is also an addict in recovery, like me. Two months ago my Dr. gave me Adderall to break out of my depression and my husband took most of them and shot them up in the garage. I didn't know he was doing that. He had had a problem with it long before we married...we just married this June. So I can't have adderall around. It helped rip 7 ounds off me. It's great for dieting and for focus. I feel like getting some more and not telling him and hiding them bc I feel they help me.
My Mother is anorexic I think. Her own Mother was obese and in order not to be like her she has dieted her whole life. She eats like a bird, is 85, walks 4 miles a day and still plays tennis. She says you can never be too rich or too thin. That's her motto. She'd rather me be thin and off meds than well and chubby.
I'm sorry you strugge with it. I don't know much about it. Are you in therapy? I'm not. I had a good therapist and she quit and I have no insurance anyways. I do go to recovery groups like AA and NA and Refuge Recovery. That helps.
I hope everything goes better for you with your family situation; I've kept up with it.