Quote:
Originally Posted by Só leigheas
Does anyone else here deal with self-destructive thoughts and actions after the abuse has stopped?
I feel as though it's what I deserve, to hurt like that. I just wish someone would give me what I've had coming. I know, be careful what you wish for. It just won't get out of my head. I deserve as much pain as I can get.
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You don't deserve the pain. That's just the thing. If you were abused in childhood, which I am guessing you were, somehow as a child, we tend to internalize the false belief that we did something to deserve the poor treatment and abuse. And that belief carries into adulthood if not treated by therapy. In no way shape or form did you deserve abuse and in no way shape or form do you deserve to feel so much pain. You have to ingrain that belief into your mind, and change your own internal conditioning.