Sometimes, the grief may not be really about missing a parent if that parent was abusive or neglectful. Instead it can mean the loss of "hope" that someday that parent might change and actually be a loving parent. Keep an open mind in that you may find an older mentor that can provide you with the caring closeness that a parent failed to offer. Sadly, some individuals who become parents genuinely don't know how to be a caring loving parent. Above all, always remember that if a parent fails in their ability to be a good loving parent it NEVER means a person did not deserve to have that kind of parent.