Very true. I actually left my H & wondered why I felt so good because I wondered about what I had always been told "that yiu can't run away from your problems because they folliw you(because they are in you).

Well first off I did find out that my H was a HUGE part of my problems & he always had been BUT with therapy & a lot if self analysis I was able to see my part in the problems of the marriage & that I returned what I saw as abuse with abuse on my own part.

The good thing about this was that 11 years after leaving him & finally getting my long awaited divorce.....we were able to have good closure on those 33 years we were married & living together. He can still be a jerk but I will no.longer react to him in the way I did. We know divorce should have happened long before I left but we have accepted things the way they are. Even in divorce it is important to look at the big picture & see the part we played it it also.....just like staying together & making it work.

Hope this new approach does work for your marriage & you find the happiness that should be in a marriage.