I was feeling quite depressed for most of the day. I went to my spine dr in the AM and we repeated the injections. I really hope they work for longer than two weeks this time. He seems confident they will. I hope so. He didn’t say what the next move was if they don’t but in the past he’s mentioned the surgery so I know that’s it. I hope I don’t have to get there.

I’m so depressed about my work situation as well. I’m disappointed I lost that job and I’m getting more and more scared about finding another job. Like even if I do, can I actually work? I’m stable now except for this situational depression but I’m so scared work will throw me into an episode no matter what the job is. But I hate not working. So I don’t know what to do. I mean I know what to do, just keep applying until something comes up and give it my best. I’m just scared. I don’t want to fail again.

One good thing is my boyfriend called me and we are ok. He wanted to make sure I knew he still wanted to talk to me so that’s why he called. I’m glad he did. I feel better about that aspect of my life now. I probably won’t be able to see him for another week but that’s ok. Just knowing he doesn’t want to end things helps.

I hope I get out of this funk soon.