I hate how depression can trick you...and play games with your fragile mind. I thought I was better yesterday...and I thought I had recovered...I had a great day and I felt better than I had been in a long time...I understood that i'd been unwell...and I was remorseful for my behaviour but understanding I couldn't help it or mean it..my head was clear...but then today I woke up..and it's not that I felt the worst I've ever been..but I woke with the dark cloud of depression over me...my head full of fear and failure...and I was sad that I had been stupid enough to believe I was better. I feel a fool..my head is so messy with so many thoughts..and i don't know which ones to believe...AM I DETERIORATING? Im changing meds...and i've noticed im crying so many times throughout the day...???...and that i want to be by myself and just sit there doing nothing..again..and i hadn't been doing that...
i feel like i was improving..but overnight I feel like I've fallen...all coz i felt i was better yesterday..
does this sound so confused??
im rambling...