I am sorry you are going through this. My husband is nothing like my abuser but he triggers me all of the time!!!

The way it happens is that there could be one small, seemingly insignificant similarity between something that happens between you and your husband or something that happens in the environment. Our brains are so sensitive to looking for that original danger, so anything remotely like any detail of the trauma could be a possible trigger.

For example, for a long time, I have had extreme anxiety about anyone entering my house unless it is spotless. It doesn't matter if I think they aren't judging me. If someone showed up at my door with my house a mess I would go into a panic. I finally figured it out one day. It is probably reasonable for a normal person to feel slightly embarrassed or uncomfortable to see their bed unmade or their house messy. That's normal. Some people might feel like they have to shove the clutter aside to close the door of a messy room. For me, the embarrassment and the secrecy reminded me of the shame and secrecy I felt when I was living with my abuser. I was carrying this big secret as a kid. Fast forward to adult life, when I would try to hide the fact that I had dirty dishes in the sink, it triggered me into feeling the same feelings of hiding the secret of my abuse. Being embarrassed by dirty dishes is very minor compared to being ashamed of being abused. However, hiding the dirty dishes caused me to feel the same exact emotions of hiding the abuse.

It is possible that some harmless thing about your husband or the situation had some slight similarity to the trauma you experienced. It triggered you.

You are doing the right thing by reaching out for help. The sooner you process through the trigger the better so that it doesn't develop into a bigger trigger.