My first T said things like that. That was, actually, how I started really disliking him before he became a mess and then we had constant direct conflicts. It was very condescending, I often felt like he was talking to a stupid kid. I asked him not to talk to me as though I was a kid because I was neither a child nor an idiot. Then he said that feeling was my transference - ridiculous. I don't recall anyone ever talking to me like sometimes he did, there was nowhere else to transfer it from.

Second T sometimes said what he did or would do but that did not bother me, I also often speak in that way when I am trying to give advice. I personally don't mind advice in therapy if it makes sense. He never said the other things and wasn't condescending at all in his communications.

Mine never seemed to play dumb but the first one certainly wasn't very smart. He was also very sloppy, for example his emails were often full of errors (same for a lot of his online media). When I complained about it and asked if he could make an effort to communicate better (sometimes I did not even understand what he wrote), he said that he uses dictation for writing and sometimes it's technical error. And that I was perfectionistic and it's likely because my parents scolded me for being sloppy. Again, never ever happened. What I mention here are some of the things where projected onto me and tried to manipulate, but there were lots of much worse things in the end.