Background: ive been in therapy for over 26yrs & meds. Walked away from it all 4.5 yrs ago.
So I’ve decided to try & find an IFS (internal family system) therapist bec the last time I was in therapy I did I FS work for three years and I thought it was a good fit for myself.
So I found and IFS therapist , who is 45 minutes away for me, and I’ve gone to two appointments & I’m already disappointed & wondering if the red flags are a sign.

The first appt we did 40min of paperwork & she seemed very unorganized. Up & down, clip boards, 3 ring binders, checking her phone & really discombobulated. Now I was having a really bad morning & I tried to fill out most of the paperwork & I had some trouble settling down to answer this tedious paperwork.
Like:
What’s your greatest accomplishment?
What are your hobbies & interests?
What do u do to relax?

Sorry, to me, this sounded like something from a magazine article. Not what I wanted to discuss. So I tried & we talked for about 10min so I could calm down & then time was up. Grrr!

Second appt we continued paperwork the entire time! History crap I really do NOT wanto discuss or get into but she kept saying it was for insurance purposes. I want this therapy to go in a certain direction, not guided by insurance & what’s supposed to be addressed. Again she had trouble locating binders, clipboards, insurance numbers, asking me my height & weight....for insurance!
“If you spend 12 hrs awake how many hrs do you dissociate? How many hours are you indecisive? How many hrs are you angry?”
Omg I have no dam clue!
This sounds like textbook crap!

Why couldn’t I have done this paperwork at home & brought it? Why is she asking me questions when I could fill out the paperwork like; my sibs names, do I have an education etc etc.
then she sat & read over her notes she took last week while we’re 40min Into the appt! I feel she should’ve done that while I was in the waiting room!
Then she gets her computer out & types for 10min her notes, again saying it’s for insurance & I’ve just about had it. I was ready to blow....& I just shut down.
Time is up!!!
Again.
So she says next wk we’re doing a safety contract, which is several pages. I know the questions. I know she has to fill this stuff out, but it’s on my time & my dime. And she said “hope you can wait a week...” regarding the safety contract!
Everything feels so rigid! Is this the way most therapy is now??

I wento her for ifs work. I understand the need for insurance stuff, but does it all have to be done during my appt?
I don’t feel a connection with her at all. This has put a bad taste in my mouth to travel this far to see her. I figure I’ll do a couple more, but for how long I’ve been in therapy I see things VERY quickly!
I’m disappointed in the process again & I have “parts” that tell me to keep going.

(But I also have parts that say, look at this severe history, trauma, abuse, mess of a client with great insurance! I’m a great client!”). Grrrr.