I’ve only been with t 6months with a lot of breaks here and there. So I don’t have great advice, but to let you know you’re not alone in your worry. I don’t like to rely on someone, or feel like I need or want something from anyone.
My T is ALWAYS asking me to reach out anytime. Call, text or email. I very occasionally email but I’m terrified doing it. I could never call or text. I hate to impose on anyone ever. Dialing a phone number is like torture for me. Even so, she still says it every session. If I do email her, she’s very kind and will usually reply the next day though I often ask her not to reply.
My logical side would say “if she allows you to reach out, that’s her choice so she’s clearly ok with it, I would encourage you to do so when you feel like it would help you in any way”
But I don’t act much on my logical side 😉