I hate this. I hate that I feel almost normal for short periods of time only to have that feeling ripped away by whatever demon lurks around my mind. Most of the time, I feel sad, or anxious, or numb and empty. But sometimes, I almost feel good, and that sucks. I think it would be better if I didn't know what normality or joy felt like to begin with. It just makes me see how truly far gone I am.